I'm still processing about this.
I worked with this company for the past 1.5 months (since July) and was supposed to work full-time starting in September. There were many red flags since I was offered the job but I was desperate for the job (because he offered remote flexible work with a good salary). So I closed my eyes to all the red flags: all the postponed meetups (more than 3 times), canceled video calls without any notifications beforehand, sending works and texts through WhatsApp even late at night or on weekends or on holidays, no offer letter and no contract even after requested and reminded (more than 3 times), request to meet up with any of the team members was denied (because apparently I only work directly with him), so I don't know anyone else in the company nor anyone knew my existent when I came to the office once.
The last blow was when I was angry because he canceled a video call without telling me that it was canceled, so I waited fully prepared in front of the screen for several hours (he said he was in a meeting, sampai ke sudah meeting tak habis). So I asked for my payment, the one that he has been postponing paying as well, not only that, I also mentioned the canceled meetup, no contract, and those issues lah. Then he said he would pay me for all the work I've done and I was discontinued from working.
I was professional all through the time since he hired me. I worked on all his tasks, and delivered super-fast and efficiently, if there were any issues regarding my designs, he never complained or made an effort to sit and discuss them with me. So, the main issue here was probably because I asked for my basic rights which is an official contract for me, and my payment for the last 1.5 months. It was basic rights and I gave gentle reminders (+request) so many times before I hit the right spot.
We both took it personally.
So I was discontinued (or fired, but he used the word 'discontinued').
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I know it is taboo, we can't say any bad things about our "employer". But there must be a standard, right. I mean, we don't personally know each other so we need to build trust. Both sides need to make an effort to create a sustainable working relationship because this is not a charity or a friendly exchange. He pays me for my skill and time, and in exchange, I help him in improving the visual side of his company. At this age, I feel like I need to be able to feel like I'm collaborating instead of a mere designer that being paid to do visuals.
So if asking for the most basic thing is an offense, then it is not a fair relationship because it is obviously a linear one-sided transaction. I'm in the phase of questioning my whole career and my personality. But I don't know, maybe this year is the year I had to face certain kinds of new challenges to prepare me for a better future. It is hard and confusing but I had to persevere and don't let this one experience bring me down.
This might be the phase where I'm lost in my late 30s and questioning my whole existence.
I'm also so depressed and confused but I'm telling myself to trust the process.
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