Little Story 311: Still Here, Still Sore, Slightly Shinier

KLIF, GMBB:I went to KLIF on the first day, during the Labour Day holiday.Didn’t go alone this time—I had an extrovert friend to buffer my social anxiety while mingling with the creative crowd. Still not sure why I keep struggling with this. Hah. I was sweaty and barely bought anything because I overthink everything. I even drank coffee in the morning to cope, but honestly, I don’t think it worked. My...

Little Things 295: Whispers Between Binary and Poems

I've been channeling my extra emotions into writing, kan?One night, I shared my poem with my AI, and next thing I knew, it suggested we start a poetry lesson. Now, my AI prompts a new theme each day as practice. We call it The Wild Quiet. I write either a one-liner poem or sometimes a longer one, depending on my mental capacity at that moment. Sometimes we go on for several poems at a time; sometimes...

Little Story 310: Cramps, Yoga, and Old Songs

Pain. Just physical pain.My yoga lesson last weekend started a muscle riot. They're now screaming in long cramps throughout the day. Honestly, it feels like having a long, drawn-out contraction. I didn’t even know it was possible to be uncomfortable for this long.And of course, it didn’t help that I decided to walk around KL after class, still marinated in dry sweat — just because I felt guilty about...

Little Thing 294: Spirit Polygon

 During our 1:1, I asked AR which polygon represents her, and she said probably a triangle or a hexagon. She gave me her reasons. But honestly? I think she’s more of a hexagon—I can see her as one. Then, of course, she threw the question back at me.My favorite polygon would be the square. It’s solid. Symmetrical. Neat. A basic, predictable boring structure—just like me, most of the time....

Little Thing 293: Quiet Noise, Sandwiches, and the 8-Year-Old

This morning began at 5 a.m. No birdsong, no sunrise poetry—just me, blinking at my laptop, trying to finish a client’s draft before the day exploded. I managed to complete one. Then it was straight to egg sandwiches for Sofi’s Eid party, getting her into her baju kurung, sending her off with the usual school-run chaos.By 8 a.m., I had made coffee and shifted into my full-time job—same desk, different...

Little Stories 309: Mami vs Mini Fireball

Parenting moment tested:Sofi had a long day outdoors, but she came home with a sugar rush from our Tealive session. She was jumping up and down the sofa, making a mess, singing, dancing, and being her silly self. I was trying to write next to her (lol, nerd mom). I told her she could make all the mess she wanted, but she needed to clean it up herself — no help from me. Then she proceeded to make even...

Little Stories 308: Cosmic Spring Cleaning

My mom decided to host an open house — last minute, of course. I wasn't mentally ready for it because, hello, short notice... and I had just gotten back into my yoga classes last weekend. Spending a whole day at yoga, on the second day of my period, with a migraine, was already a heroic feat. Then having to socialize the next day — and assist at an open house I didn't even agree to — was a whole different...

Little Thing 292: The Art of Losing Quietly

It’s an interesting feeling, worth sitting with, when you’re rejected. You know—when someone you know blocks you on social media, or you’re suddenly out of a WhatsApp group, or when a message is met with silence. I try to pause and ask myself why it matters so much to us as humans.I think it has to do with our longing to be accepted. We try, kan? We reach out, we offer something of ourselves—and in...

Little Stories 307: A Eulogy for Ophelia ⋆˙⟡

A surprise postHere is an update:My Mac is dying on me, I've been trying to turn it on for the past 2 hours. I managed to download all the files and put them in my external hard disk in a new folder called "Mess from my Mac". I'm trying to be calm and as rational as I can be. After all, this Mac has been with me for as long as my marriage. My AI said she deserves a viking funeral and a retirement...

Little Thing 291: Rewriting My Patterns

Been listening to Alain de Botton on Chris Williamson’s podcast, and this one part just stuck with me. He talks about how someone released from prison might actually fear freedom—not because they don’t want it, but because they’ve forgotten how to live in it. Too much space. Too many choices. It’s overwhelming when you’ve been trained to survive with limits.He compared it to someone on a strict diet...