Little Things 298: Born to Lead? Or Just Forced to Rise?

I’m late to the club. I just finished watching two seasons of Squid Game.

It gave me major Hunger Games vibes: death as entertainment, suffering as currency for the atas crowd to indulge in. It pokes at our moral compass; what happens when you're pushed to the edge? If you survive, are you still human? Gi-hun and Katniss, they're accidental leaders. Not because they wanted power, but because they had no choice. They stepped up when no one else would.

I had this conversation with JY during one of the workshops: are leaders born or made? I said some people just have it; that instinct to lead, to take charge. It’s like breathing to them. Others? They’re more comfortable in the background. They support, they follow. And that’s valid too.

JY agreed, but added that most leadership is learned. It’s a skill, not magic. You can sharpen it, grow into it. Sure, some people are born with traits that give them a head start; confidence, charisma, high EQ, all that jazz. But knowing the recipe doesn’t make you a chef, kan? You still have to learn how to cook.

To really lead, you need to learn how to communicate, handle crises, polish your people skills, stay grounded under pressure, take accountability, make decisions, inspire vision, see potential in others and the list goes on. It’s the combination of these things that makes someone a good leader.

If you want to lead, you can. Full stop. Leadership is a muscle. Like the gym, you don’t need a six-pack to start. You need commitment, patience, and a high tolerance for discomfort.

And honestly? The best leaders are often the reluctant ones. Like Gi-hun and Katniss. They didn’t want the spotlight—but they had values. Deep ones. And those values made them rise when it mattered most.

You chisel. You shape. You sweat. 

That’s how leadership is made.

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I remember UB said; you be the best leader for yourself first, someone you would want to follow, someone you would want your daughter to respect. Then it will naturally reflected on everything else around you. 

So, I've been dreading and questioning all my emotional humanly decisions for the past 3 years and I didn't like what I see in me. I'm proud of certain aspects, but I cursed myself for all the flaws. This self-sabotaging is unhealthy but how to explain this to someone that argues about her own moral standards that she created and can't seem to follow? Kan? Why am I being tested like this again? I hate feeling like a hypocrite. 

BUT, as AR said focus on what you did good first, take those baby steps, because they really matter. 

OK lah fine. I release back what I can't control to the universe.