Little Stories 221 : A Soft Goodbye

That Thursday night, we received a news about Af's dad. He complained about his headache, and before he manage to walk out after he agreed on going to the hospital, he fell down, unconscious. The ambulance took him to Raub's hopsital, and they directed him to a bigger hospital in Temerloh. 

I was having my usual headache, so I slept early. Af woke me up saying that he needed to go back to Raub, his father was unconscious and in critical condition. I stayed, my headache was too bad to even think rationally. I woke up early that morning, replied to Af's update. His dad had stroke attack, and brain haemorrhage. I knew what that meant, I watched too much of Grey's Anatomy. So I decided to pack my bag and head to Temerloh. Ma and Mi wanted to follow and send me - so I cancelled the bus ride.

Af and I stayed at the hospital that Friday to wait with Af's mom. His father was brain dead and the machine was keeping him alive, for our sake. Everyone came, they can't decide on turning off the machine. No one can hold that responsibility in letting people go, can they?  It was the hardest time for his family, and it hurt me to see them hurt so much. I've never cried that much in my life. I'm glad I was there, witnessing everything. I'm glad I stayed next to him until his last breath, I held his hand when his heartbeats slowed down and stopped. I have nothing to say to him, except for a soft goodbye.

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He was a kind man, quite soft-spoken, and always kept to himself. I hardly talk with him over the year compared to Af's mom, but I find myself at peace with his solitary life. I like to claim him, Af and me as pure introverts, the small team of people who keep ourselves among ourselves. I liked him. 

I realized that the things that matter is not things that were left unsaid or undone, but just the things left behind after all that happened. We can never rewind the past even how much we regretted certain things, but we can always make a change for things that will be written in the future. Don't dwell on the past and people go went it's their time to go, the hard part is for us to accept and adept.

:(

Al-Fatihah. 

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