Little Stories 256 : About Walking Last Week (and book search, of course)

 

Last week I decided to watch Barbie, after spending many days working in front of the computer. I think I deserve a rest, so I got ready, went out early in the morning in the hard rain, and took the Grab to IOI. On the way to IOI, suddenly my sister texted me, asking what I was doing (on that random morning, on a weekday) and I told her that I was on my way to watch Barbie. At that exact moment, the plan instantly changed and she was there with me to watch Barbie. I was somewhat annoyed because she invited herself (I thought it was my personal day off), but later on, I was glad because:

1. GSC no longer accepts cash, they don't even have a manual ticket counter and on that particular day, I only had cash. So she saved the plan and we managed to buy tickets to watch Barbie. 
2. We bought a 1030 am movie on a weekday, so there was literally no one else except for us in the cinema. Imagine if I only went there alone, in a dark secluded place, if anything happens, then no one would know. 

So I learned 3 things on that day: 

1. Cash alone is no longer reliable, always bring along digital money with you. 
2. Don't watch movies during the off-peak time, alone. If you are alone, watch it during peak time instead. Or at least see if anyone else already booked any other seats so you won't be literally alone in there.  
3. Things happen because they need to happen, you might feel annoyed at first because you didn't expect it, but eventually, the right reasons will reveal themselves and you'll be glad that it happened *hopefully.

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Ok.

Moving forward several days later, I was supposed to meet my boss that afternoon. Like any normal person meeting her employer, I prepared early, called in Grab on another rainy morning, and headed to the office on a train. Halfway to the office, my boss postponed the meetup, again. 

I was prepared mentally to spend the day in the city after the meetup, right. So I didn't want to go home just yet. Yes, I was again, somewhat annoyed by the change of plan. I made a stop at Pasar Seni, went to a random cafe, and spent several hours reading Conversations with Friends until the very last page. It was a blissful silent morning, having to read without distraction. I had a matcha latte and a plain croissant (and apparently, that was my only food of the day). I sat there until I finished reading and then there were a couple of people who decided to sit next to my table and spent the entire time trying to get the nicest selfies to post on social media, they were loud and happy, and I felt that I should go. 

I didn't have any plans, I was in the middle of the busy city on a Friday afternoon. So I walked and walked and walked. I know about the Junk Book Store in Bukit Bintang, but the last time I went there, the used books were quite pricy, even more expensive than new books in Bookxcess. I walked from Pasar Seni station to Central Market, I tried to find the Used Bookstore in CM but apparently, it was closed down. I explored the place, it's been a while since I spent time in CM (*it held histories). Then from CM, I went back to Pasar Seni, I needed cheap books, so I headed to The Garden to go to Artfriend and Bookxcess. Bought some supplies and some books, and walked some more until it was late in the afternoon, it rained heavily again, and felt like I used up the time to recharge well that day.

There, a good day was spent on books and walking.

I wish I was in a city where cheap used books can be found everywhere, but I'm not and books are really expensive in Malaysia. Too bad my hobby is expensive to maintain. 

Here are some of the bookstores I went to this year:

• Eslite at Bukit Bintang
• Kinokuniya at KLCC
• MPH at Nu Sentral
• Tsutaya Bukit Jalil
• Books & Bobs, GMBB
• Bookxcess at The Garden
• Bookxcess at REX KL
• Bookxcess at MyTown

Okay, I will try the National Library next time and see if their book listing improved over the years.

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And on Sunday, I went out for a hilly run. 

Specifically a hill run because I needed the training and the hardship of doing something I didn't like so I could rise above. Later I was sore all over the whole day. 

Books: Same Topic As Always (but August update)

The window to Scribd's major library opens again (probably for 2 weeks, like usual). So I'm starting up the Scribd marathon again. The last time I listened to any good books was around 2 weeks ago (apparently, it is even less than that, around 10 days). But then I also managed to score 2 audiobooks from Kindle audible trials so that's what I've been listening to when I walk to pick up Sofi in early Aug (when I was deprived of good audiobooks, boo). 

On Kindle: I'm slowly listening to Jordan Peterson's 12 Rules for Life - and it is not an easy book. So I hardly listen to it. 

Physical Book: I finished Sally Rooney's Conversation with Friends yesterday! I've been reading it for the past 2 weeks. This book reminded me of my past. Not the affair, or the sexual activities that keep on popping up in all of Sally Rooney's fiction - just the emotions in general. Af bought the book for me from Carousell *not knowing how soft-porny Sally Rooney books can be. It is like reading a depressive romance if you know what I mean. If you want to feel frustrated with relationships, go ahead and read Sally Rooney. 

During the short opening, I finished :

• Getting Lost by Annie Ernaux - audiobook
• A Migrating Bird by Elif Shafak - short story ebook
• Conversation with Friends by Sally Rooney - physical book
• How to Stay Sane in an Age of Division by Elif Shafak - short story ebook
• Washes, Pray by Noor Naga - physical book
• Novelist as Vocation by Haruki Murakami - audiobook

This week is one of the rare weeks that I managed to finish a lot of books because I actually dedicated the time to sit and finish up these long-kept books.

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This part was written early this week when the Scribd listing was just made available again:

It's audiobook week, baby!

Okay, we only have 2 weeks window, so I need a good enough strategy. I'm planning on listening to fiction that I want to read, basically, I want female writers of, different ethnicity, and different countries lived/living in, with different backgrounds. 

• Babel by RF Kuang - the hardcover costs around RM 100 at this moment, which is a bit too much. It is difficult to bring to places because it is big and thick, and you might only want to read it once. So it is only pretty for a collection on your shelves. This book will take 21 hours to finish at average speed, half that if you put on double speed. RF Kuang was born in China and lived in the US since she was young (an Asian-American), I listened to Yellowface last month.  (done)
• Temper by Phoebe Walker. A fiction about being an anxious woman in her own bubble seems like a relatable topic, would give this one a chance. She is originally from Northumberland and she lived in London and the Netherlands. 
• The Polyglot Lovers by Lina Wolff. The writer was born in Sweden and lived in Spain & Italy, which might be a good mix.
• 28 Questions by Indyana Schneider is an Australian writer + soprano. She grew up in Sydney and later moved to the UK. 
• Getting Lost by Annie Ernaux. I hope you know her, she is the French writer that won the Nobel Prize in Literature last year. I listened to several of her books throughout the year, and I want to read this one next. (done)
• Reproduction by Louisa Hall, an American writer. A book on pregnancy, pain, women's anxiety, and Frankenstein. (done)
• A Migrating Bird is a short story by Elif Shafak (not an audiobook, but a 24-page short story - that can finish in one sitting). An award-winning Turkish-British writer - I love her works. (done)
• Novelist as Vocation by Haruki Murakami - Originally published in 2015, but translated into English and published last year. You can only get the hardcover in bookstores and I'm still waiting for the paperback. So I'm going to listen to this for sure because it has been a while. (done)

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Among all books:

• My favorite book this year is probably Simple Passion by Annie Ernaux because of her honest heart-breaking documentation, despite being a scandalous topic - I wrote about it here. But I love her other book that I listened to last year more; I Remain in Darkness (this one makes me cry). 
• There are also some new writers that I found, which I enjoyed reading; Noor Naga's If An Egyptian Cannot Speak English and YiYun Li's works. 
• I also love love love my research on Hermann Hesse's books this year, I read 5 of his books this year and I'm hoping to continue more before the year ends - I have 2 more of his books waiting on my Kindle. 
• Lily and the Octopus by Steven Rowley is not among my favorites, but it did make me cry because it hit the right sadness spot. 
• Books I didn't like this year: The Professor by Faisal Tehrani (a bit too obnoxious), The Secret History by Donna Tartt (I was not invested until the end and I wasted my time), and Adultery by Paulo Coelho (too preachy, I don't think he should write in woman's pov - he should have just written from his pov as a man). 

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It's good that whenever I feel like I don't want to write anything, I can still write about books. Is this my distraction? Is this what's keeping me from being stuck in my feelings? Sheesh. I think I need a run. 

Little Thing 269 : The Sheep-Shepherd Analogy

 

Have you heard about the analogy between the shepherd, the flock of sheep, the sheepdog, and the wolf?

• The shepherd is the caregiver, the guide, the ruler, and the observant who can see the whole picture, their task is to train the dog, tend the sheep, and they are responsible for everything that happens; to the sheepdog and the sheep. They need to provide a safe place to live in, and basic necessities for everyone. 
• The wolf is the threat who preys on the sheep, the scary monster that lurks when you are not watching, the ones that can do harm without mercy, the predator, they are stronger and smarter.
• The sheepdog's responsibility is to protect the sheep, direct the movement, ensure every sheep is in the group, alert and defend when there are possible threats or any attack from outside. In society, people like this are usually in law enforcement, their task is to protect and defend. 
• The flock of sheep is the majority of society, they are calm, gentle, and peaceful beings, and they follow the path that is shown to them, they have value, and they would never harm others. They are vulnerable, and they can't protect themselves from the wolves.

Issues with the analogy:

• Leadersheep exists. In real life, based on research, sheep do take turns while moving in a flock, they alternate between the role of leader and follower and ultimately achieve some form of "collective intelligence" ie the team's capacity and capability to perform a task in solving a problem. They don't only have "one leader" to guide them, they take a turn temporarily, it is teamwork. Sheep are much smarter than we assume they are, sure every once in a while there are lost sheep, or the collective motion is interrupted probably by a single sheep that wanted a rest and stop, but it is unavoidable to do mistakes. It is not a perfect system, but it exists nonetheless. This was not known to us, we assumed they were all lost and needed guidance and protection, all the time. 
• The analogy is by comparing us to animals, but in a way, animals follow their natural instinct, it is what they are, but we are human with 'akal', we are complicated beings capable to think. Sheep follow their flocks because it is how they are wired, sheepdog protects because they are trained to do so. But we are capable to reach beyond that simple analogy. For example, wolves do not simply terrorize or bully sheep because they are capable to do so or because they are stronger, they only hunt to eat, and it is not personal. But when humans do malicious things or choose to manipulate others, it is always for their own personal gain. It is not instinct, but a choice. This analogy is too simple and broad to compare with us.
• What if you don't feel like you are the shepherd, wolf, sheepdog, or sheep? What if you are naturally a loner who chooses not to participate that much in society? Loners are often considered an outcast, and most of the time they are highly observant. They are capable to move into the system, and participating when needed, being self-reliant, not picking one label to define their 'status'. Not exactly the shepherd, the wolf, the sheepdog, or the sheep.  
• If you went on an interview and the person asked you whether you are a shepherd, a wolf, a sheepdog, or a sheep, what should you answer? You should answer depending on what you want to offer to the company. If it is leadership (like director/team leader/manager), go for an obvious answer, the shepherd. If it is in sales and marketing, go for the wolf, you need to be able to know your strength and use it for the best, you need to be hungry for success and hunt for opportunities, the ability to manipulate is a bonus strength in pursuing something (if not used for personal gain). A sheepdog is a great answer as well, able to listen to commands, to be trained to guide the team, a small leader, and an important member of a company. Don't try to be philosophical during an interview, it might backfire.

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There is a negative perception of being a sheep: 

Don't be a sheep is a way of saying that each individual of a group shouldn't blindly be thinking, or acting, the same way.

In this, we assume sheep are too stupid to defend themselves and they are the lowest ones in the circle. But in nature, sheep are physically weak and vulnerable compared to their predators, so they protect themselves by being in a large flock instead of being singled out to explore on their own. It is their own survival mechanism, they need to be together to protect one another. They need to be able to work on a system to move together. It is their own way to adapt. So it is not completely bad, isn't it? Their ability to pass the leadership to whichever sheep to lead temporarily is amusing. 

Do you think we, humans can simply pass our power to lead like passing a baton to someone else by trust? Do you think we are capable to do that? I don't think so. Humans tend to hold on to their power like it is a precious thing not to be shared. We don't trust one another.

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I always heard this analogy since I was small, and I often wonder where I am in this? 

So, if I were to choose who I am in this circle, I think I would be the random traveler, a vagabond writer stopping by at a random farm observing the simple small circle, creating the analogy in her mind, writing in her own notebook to reflect on later and, off to another slow-burn adventure.

Baaaa.

Little Stories 255 : A Week Summed Up

This week felt different.

How different? This part, I'm not exactly sure. I'm in the process of deciphering the current state of my mind. Maybe I was too occupied with catching up along with a sudden massive amount of work that I had. Perhaps it was due to Sofi's week in trial daycare, I had more time to do my own stuff. Maybe because of the extra socializing that went on throughout the week, while at the same time having so much extra alone time as well. The burst of energy was then replaced with continuous silence. 

I did so many things, and at the same time, I felt like I did so little.

Liberated and yet, restrained.

These conflicting feelings are confusing. 

Or it is just, new.

This week went by so fast and each day was quite different that even I can't wrap it up. But it is a week worth mentioning, a week worth deciphering. There are days when I went out and walked the whole day, and there are days when I was stuck in front of the computer from morning till night. 

And the food, so much nice food.

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Day by day:

I had a good breakfast and lunchtime with Af last Monday, he showed me around his office area, showed me where he had breakfast most days, showed me the lookout point from his office building, and brought me to have lunch at the place that we used to go to (still the best sambal so far). I walked so much later on that day, even spent almost 2 hours in Kino between breakfast and lunchtime while waiting for him. Thank you for that day, it was special.

On Tuesday I spent the day with my mom and siblings - because we had insurance errands to deal with. 

On Wednesday, I spent the whole day working at home, stuck in front of the computer.

On Thursday I went out to have breakfast with Ms Chin before I start working full-time. I need to update her on my life lately and she updated me with her current affairs: the activities, the previous Hokkaido trip, friends, food. Spent a good 2 hours in a cafe toying around with our now-cold breakfast after chatting for so long. We wrapped it up nicely, I hope she had a good time as well. I don't know when the next time will be. 

Then, I asked my brother to join me for lunch (okay, not asked, he had to pay for my lunch because I paid his' the previous day when we went out and I didn't want to go back home just yet). We went to Pizza Mansion in BB and again, I spent a good deal of time talking with him while waiting for the end of Sofi's daycare. Good company, good food (although I was bloated later on, but not as bad). 

On Friday, I was stuck in front of the computer from really early in the morning until late at night, again, working (or catching up because I wanted to utilize the whole week with activities while Sofi in daycare).

Then on Saturday, it was PRN day. So my siblings and my mom stayed over at my house for breakfast and lunch (because the school for our polling is just 100 meters just my house). This was not wholly a a perfect day because it was election day so you can imagine the 'heat'. But all-in-all, a hectic socializing day as well. 

Finally, on Sunday, I was stuck at home with Sofi for almost the whole day, and later that late afternoon I decided to go back to Nilai - unplanned. Aja came and picked us up, we went out for an ice cream stop and suddenly we were back at my mom's. Then from being only the two of us for days to the whole crowd. 

That summed up my busy social week. 

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On work:

Who wants to talk about work when life is much more colourful and interesting? 

It has been occupying my time and space lately. 

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On having beautiful meals at home:

Okay, honestly I'm not making an extra effort every day. There are days when I eat just porridge with fried egg, there are days when I eat white bread and kaya spread only - I just choose not to take the photos la, sbb tak lawa, that's it. But when I make an effort to prepare nice meals, then I'll be proud of myself sbb I'm mostly malas nk makan proper. Hah hah hah....

I really wanted a more protein and fiber-based meal when I'm home so I'm experimenting with the different types of veggies because they don't make our food colourful when we eat out - other than salad starter (lettuces make me bloated so I had to be creative). 

So, here's to some of the rajin moments:

Apparently sourdough bread is a better version of bread because it is richer in nutrients, less likely to spike your blood sugar (pretending I don't drink 3-in-1 coffee along with it), less gluten and better for digestion. Note: I bought the whole loaf of sourdough bread at dodoo to try. 

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Observation on the PRN:

I am mostly feeling ashamed, baffled by the nonchalant hatred thrown at each other, the layers of masks people choose to wear based on who they are talking to, the shameless name-calling, malicious slanders, things that came not out of love for each other as human, but according to our religion, the colour of our skin, the ethnicity, the difference in our status, our level in society, the badge we are wearing. 

To make sense of this, I referred to Shams Tabriz's 40 rules of love - because when I'm disappointed in human beings, I find inspiration to love again:

Rule 16: Real faith is the one inside. The rest simply washes off. There is only one type of dirt that cannot be cleansed with pure water, and that is the stain of hatred and bigotry contaminating the soul. You can purify your body through abstinence and fasting, but only Love will purify your heart. - Shams Tabriz

I can't teach people how to love; the love that is selfless, pure, kind, and beautiful. The love that comes simply by knowing we are out there struggling and it is supposed to bring us together. When you tell me your pain, it is not the time for me to tell you that my pain is bigger, but the time for me to listen and to know that I am not alone. 

We are one, whether you noticed it or not.

 

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On books: Really busy week, no books. Boo. 

But I started reading Sally Rooney's Conversation with Friends, I didn't know that it is a story about love affair connections between these 2 college students and an older married couple. 

Review : 1.5 year later - Kindle 10th Gen

Remember that I bought this Kindle 10th gen in Dec 2021?

You can't no longer buy Kindle 10th gen from Kindle Malaysia but they now offer this new basic Kindle 11th gen (2022) version instead or Kindle Paperwhite 5 (2021) (11th Gen). You can probably buy cheaper ones from other shops (but I can't say, I bought mine from Kindle Malaysia because they were trustworthy and their support team is reliable). Please do some research if you want to buy from other sellers ya.

Here I made a comparison between these current 2 models in 2023:

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With ads/without ads:

What's the difference between 'with ads' and 'without ads'? Just that during the Kindle is idle (while not used on lock screen), it will show a promo picture of books, that's it. Not annoying, not intrusive, just like a poster of books that's it. So, for me, I don't have any problem with the ads (except when it shows some hunky-body duds in random romance book ads). It looks something like this:

With casing/without casing:

If you buy the casing from Kindle Malaysia (+add on), it will be a little bit expensive. You can buy it anywhere from Shopee instead. More options and much cheaper, the one I bought is around RM 35 and it works fine until now. 

The "free 1 million Kindle eBooks from Reader Library for 6 months" offer: Well, none of the books listed were interesting enough for me so I didn't even take advantage of that. Mostly classics lit, and already free on public domain books. 

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My thoughts on my Kindle:

Mine is Kindle 10th Gen (2019) - 

I bought my Kindle for RM 495 in Dec 2021 (now the new Kindle starts from RM 650). It is 6”, with a 167 ppi screen, and weighs 174g. The storage is only 8 GB but that can store up to 2 thousand books (I think it’s more than enough) plus they offer cloud storage on Amazon. If you only read half an hour per day, the battery can last up to a month. But nowadays my battery can only last around 2-3 weeks, even less if I listen to an audiobook. I can’t play audiobooks on the device itself but I need to connect it to any Bluetooth earphone or speaker.

It is light and small enough for me. I can even put it in my back-pocket jeans or a small handbag. I love the size, it takes so little space in my life. The battery lasts long too, easy to travel and I can bring bookstores everywhere (which is always nice, but not money-wise lah). Oh, Amazon also always offers cheaper digital books and books on promos. I bought a lot of cheap books for $0.99 - $1.99. It is also so easy to buy a book, just one-click when you already linked it with your debit/credit card (Sofi accidentally bought so many books in the past) but canceling and getting the refund is easy enough, just make sure you don't turn off the email notification.

My Kindle vs the latest Kindle: double the storage, higher resolution, slightly lighter, with adjustable temperature light and improved battery life.

Should you buy it? It depends, if you really want an e-reader, basic Kindle is a really good choice. I've never tried or compared it with other e-readers except for iPad so I can't say much about the comparison. I didn't like reading on iPad (it makes my eyes hurt). Reading on Kindle is just like reading on paper, less strain on the eyes, no glare, and you don't have to wear blue-light glasses. 

Sure, it is not the same as physical books - I know! But it is a good option when you are deprived of good books, physical books are crazy expensive nowadays. Not every one can spend RM 50 - RM 80 on each latest fiction, and at an obsessive reader's rate, imagine how much we need to spend each month just to entertain our curious minds? So e-books it is.

Oh yes, I know it is not my birthday yet, but you can always always always buy me a book gift card - here's my email: azreen0301@gmail.com :D Book fairy please bring me more books. Thank you for your time and happy weekend!

Little Stories 254 : Quick Breakfast at Broom

I don't have anything worth your time to tell about this post, it is just a post about a beautiful cafe, beautiful lines of pastries, a divine frothy dairy-free matcha latte, and a nice vibe. A fancy place for a plain person (like me, I do feel out of place). I was an hour early for the Moss Fest event, so we decided to have breakfast at Broom Artisan Bakery just right next to AweGallery. 

As I said, nothing much to tell about the place - it was surely beautiful, and it gave inspiration for me to do a food spread in my doodle journal. Price-wise, it is just like any other cafe: my croissant was RM 7 and my matcha latte was RM 15. My mom would surely membebel if she sees any of us eat out like this (even though I do this only once or twice a month - but I posted it online when I do, so it seems often enough).

I mean, how could I not? Again, the place is beautiful and the foods are visually appealing. How could I not appreciate beautiful things in life? Look at these, it's the art of food styling, interior designing, and visual branding in one go :

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Remember in Croisserie I sat at table number 11 and this time I sat at table number 1: 

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Look at that frothy matcha latte in a ceramic clay cup - it was heavy and thick ok. I want to bring home the Japanese cup if I can. Plus the croissant is crusty and buttery. I didn't eat those desserts that much because I wanted to avoid dairy (I had a workshop to attend):

But anyway, it wasn't a nice time because I still feel awkward with my brother-in-law and he seemed to not enjoy having to spend more money on 'basic food' and good vibes. But in my defense, perhaps to maintain good things in life, you'll be needing to put extra $$ on certain things? It's really hard to find good things that are free, right? Sure I do mamaks often enough, but nothing at mamaks are nice to be photographed or visually appreciated, they don't really care about the visual part of food or interior of the restaurant or the design of things.

Is it so wrong to spend money every now and then to appreciate beautifully crafted things?

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Anyway, the next day I invited myself for a simple breakfast at my brother's house (because I want to try sourdough bread that he just bought) plus we need to buy groceries from NSK. I didn't eat for more than 15 hours by then so I was light-headed when we arrived and could not help him at all in the kitchen. Yes, I have the habit of leaving my stomach empty for a long stretch of time - especially if I had late lunch the day before :F Not a good habit. 

Anyway, here's what his 'simple breakfast' stands for:

But then, he is a baker and he loves to make food for people, I guess he really enjoyed this (so I secretly transferred money to pay for the food and drink later that day as a token of appreciation).

That's it for my end of July beautiful food post ! 

Books: 10 years of Book-Consumption Challenge

First of all, I don't want to explain my obsession towards written words, second, I want to embrace my nerdiness and accept that I am 'that' kind of book nerd: that talks about books and writers, that watches Booktube and follow booktubers, that buys books on top of more unread books, that always has a plan B secret books on every single device that I own, that loves to walk in bookstores and library, that always, always stop at people's bookshelves and interested in what others are reading.  

Some people are obsessed with money, some people are obsessed with K-drama, or maybe food, or movie, or cars, or any material things on planet Earth (or maybe even outer space if you want) - everyone is some kind of a nerd in their own way. I'm a book nerd, through and through. 

Every year, I challenge myself to read based on my age, I was 26 in 2013, so I challenged myself to read 26 books, and the number grows according to my age. In the first half of the 10 years journey, it was hard to reach the goal because "books are expensive and reading time is limited" (this will always in the present tense). But since 2018, I was introduced to Scribd and audiobooks, my book consumption changed since then. In that year alone I manage to consume more than 100 books, the next year in 2019 I had Sofi so I didn't read that much, but years afterward I kept on going strong lah (at least 50 books per year).

Books are still very expensive, and time is forever limited. 

But I always find time to read or listen to books.

I hardly buy new books since 2016, but I mostly buy preloved books, do book exchange, borrow and rent books, listen to audiobooks, try a trial week on multiple book apps, subscribe to book apps, and so on. So the books in my keeping did not grow that much (but still byk lah, kalau nk pindah, pening). 

Yea, 50 books a year is not that much if compared to other readers, but among non-readers, 50 books is quite a lot. I think if I combine the number of books everyone in my family reads, it won't even reach 10 books (not even in the last 5 years combined). Imagine that..... or maybe my family doesn't read that much. 

 

I consumed 562 books in the past 12 years, and I'm hoping to reach 1000 books (but what if I reread some of the books, is it considered 1 book or multiple experiences - because I love to reread some of the books). But that's just a number, I don't really care actually. Bila kita truly suka sesuatu, kita buat sbb kita nak buat, tak perlu push pun jadi :F tu namanya 'passion'. 

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I also want to break the stereotype of thinking people who read are smart. Nope, we aren't that smart, or at least I don't feel any smarter than everyone else. I feel like I'm just as average as all the average people in the world. Yes, it seems like I'm adding more knowledge points inside my brain by reading, but it depends on the type of reading that I do and the kind of books as well. For example, I don't understand a lot of things when I read philosophical books written by philosophers so I had to read the dumb version to just take the first layer to understand things, or maybe I want to read classics, but classics are sometimes too hard, too flowery, berpeluh ketiak nak paham. It's always a struggle.

I don't know so many things, and I feel dumber just by reading more. Gitu. 

But, but, but, if I have a choice to pick one thing to do all throughout my life, I would choose reading. I would want to read books, good books, great books, I would. It's the window to other people's imagination, the content of their souls, the secrets that are waiting to be discovered, the hidden messages, the obsessive thoughts, the unspoken ideas, that lay inside the writer. I can read them silently, and it's a lovely way to discover humans.

Random : Books Lately, Converting to Threads, and Random Updates

What's old, what's new:

• The day Elon decided to change Twttr's logo to 'X', I deactivated my Twttr account and opened a Threads account. I don't think he cares about his users, so it doesn't matter. I just don't want him to win. He is the epitome of toxic masculinity.
• I got an invite to Moss Fest by Mossery last weekend. I'm both honored and excited, but I'm planning to write about the whole event later.
• I printed new colouring zines and reprinted Quaranzine because I sold out all copies (and I need to restock to Stickerrific).
• I've been doing design work again (with my supposedly new 'boss'), but I've been having impostor syndrome and I believe I can't design anything. It is so tough, having to push my mind into thinking that this is all just a phase, that I need to confront my own depressive mode affecting my creativity. Fin fin fin. 
• Broom's Cafe matcha latte with its substitute milk was divine (forgot whether it was oat/almond/soy), but it was so beautiful I could cry. 
• I saw ImpactMints' new box design and I had to buy it, I tried to find the peach flavor but only could find a blackcurrant one in pastel purple. For the longest time, the only version I could find was the ones with the collaboration with Kakao - didn't like that version. You know, even after more than 10 years, the smell sticks.
• I've been listening to 'one-book-per-day' lately. I don't know how I managed to do that though, perhaps because I've been spending a lot of time alone lately:
• Friday: Days at Morasaki Bookshop by Satoshi Yagisawa
• Monday: Yellowface by RF Kuang
• Tuesday: Women Talking by Miriam Toews
• Wednesday: Pure by Kim Alexander
• Thursday: Bedtime Story by Chloe Hopper

I have limited books to choose from based on what's available on Scribd, so I am not that picky - as long as it is an engaging story, I'll take it. Not going to complain about the free book options ok. So, it has been an interesting ride so far because I didn't know much about these books when I chose them. Usually, I'll just wear my earphone throughout the day and play the audiobook (while sending/picking up Sofi from school, while cooking, while doing chores and work, or drawing). 

I'm really excited about books lately because I've been writing a lot (but I don't want to jinx it). But haven't I been excited about books for as long as anyone can remember? 

• Days at Morasaki Bookshop was a feel-good book, relaxing, if you want to destress.
• Yellowface was an interesting book, I'm new to issues like Asian white-washing, racism, cultural appropriation, the book publishing industry, and social media bullying. So it was an interesting and engaging story for me.
• Women Talking was an eye-opening and thought-provoking book, it is painful to imagine that this was based on a real event. This book adds up my distrust for the entirety of men. I have so many emotions mixed inside while listening to this. Also, how grateful I am for having the freedom to have education and access to knowledge. 
• Pure was pure entertainment, like watching chick-lit on Netflix. Falling in love with a unicorn in a mortal body? This felt like my early 20s kinda book and slightly felt like a soft-porn? It felt silly at times, but I'm too serious most of the time, let's chill a bit.
• Bedtime Story is a beautifully written book, a memoir, and perhaps, we can call it a manual on how to tell children 'the hard truth', about sickness, cancer, and dying. As a mother myself, this book is a reminder to think ahead about these issues and how to confront these big questions. I would come back to this book if I needed it someday :F

Note: Please let me read many good books, Amin~