Book/Movie : All of Us Strangers

 

All of Us Strangers:

In April, I listened to a book called Strangers by Taichi Yamada. I found All of Us Strangers on Hotstar this week, and I thought I would watch it just to feed my curiosity - anything by Andrew Scott or Paul Mescal has been great so far. The movie is loosely based on the book - the rough idea is the same, but the story, the representation, and the focus are totally different.

Strangers felt like reading Murakami - probably because I read a translation, it always feels raw and too "clean" to read translated Japanese/Korean fiction, and then it touches upon loneliness. Both reminded me of Murakami. Men in pain trope. 

But then, All of Us Strangers was different, a good different. It is a beautiful movie, perhaps just like watching Call Me By Your Name (if you know you know). It might be not for everyone, but it is still a beautiful movie for me. I cried so much. The first half was a little bit hard to watch, but then the second half was just painfully beautiful. It's great if you don't know anything about the story - but be warned that you might need to deal with uncomfortable scenes. 

Beautiful parts portrayed in the movie:

• of childhood trauma
• of wanting to be seen, loved, and understood 
• of loneliness in a group, in a family, in society
• of vulnerability
• of grief & letting go
• of acceptance 

Just painstakingly beautiful. Tsk.

There was this scene when Andrew was talking in the bed with his "mom" because he couldn't sleep, and they were talking about intricate plans that he imagined could have happened. And because I'm a mother now, this scene hit me and my tears were flowing so fast. 

When she said that she remembered she used to feel like she desperately wanted him to grow up fast so that she could have a good night's sleep - because he always had something that he was scared of and couldn't sleep in his room. Then he said sorry for those times, and she said she was sorry, she should have relished those moments T^T

And that scene when he personally had the talk with his dad and he asked questions that he has kept for a long time - we know these moments rarely happen in real life. These heart-to-heart talks with our parents when we are all adults - these unspoken childhood dramas. 

To tell you the truth, childhood trauma stays with you for a really long time. Especially when we pretend it isn't there. There is something about how mentally unprepared we are with the pain that makes it stay permanent, it is there like an old tattoo - faded and ugly. So, in the movie, when he said it was okay it was a long time ago, but then ugly cried - I can relate. 

The book was plain and just - lonely. 

The movie was emotional, made me feel stuff and cry. 

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