Excerpt 03 : Solitude

“Solitude is, more or less, an inevitable circumstance. Sometimes, however, this sense of isolation, like acid spilling out of a bottle, can unconsciously eat away at a person’s heart and dissolve it. You could see it, too, as a kind of double-edged sword. It protects me, but at the same time steadily cuts away at me from the inside. I think in my own way I’m aware of this danger—probably through experience—and that’s why I’ve had to constantly keep my body in motion, in some cases pushing myself to the limit, in order to heal the loneliness I feel inside and to put it in perspective. Not so much as an intentional act, but as an instinctive reaction.” ― Haruki Murakami, What I Talk About When I Talk About Running.

Book : The Reader's Voice

I happened to learn about the reader's voice from Cornelia Funke's trilogy : Inkheart. 

Mortimer Folchart or Mo, is a book binder.  He got this ability to bring characters from books to the real world. What I loved about Mo other than having a full-time job to treat books everyday is and his powerful reader's voice. The writer beautifully explained how some people have the ability to let written words alive. So I imagined how Mo's powerful story-telling would be in real life. 

Mo could paint the air with his voice alone.

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Some people do have the reader's voice. It captures your attention, it makes you listen. Some politicians have this ability, some public speakers need to learn this skill. I strongly believe that if your job is to speak to people, you need to know about this. Or else, many people, including me, would not listen to you while you speak. Not as an act of rudeness, we will just choose to avoid any possibilities of having to listen to you.

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Anyhow, in finding people with great reader's voice, I came across the famous celebrity writer : Neil Gaiman. I keep on having a strong feeling that being a celebrity writer makes you less a writer but he keeps on showing me that I am wrong. Not only did he wrote so many books, published novel graphics,  gave such an inspiring commencement speech last year, got a beautiful little library and a very a classic house with such beautiful dogs, and many more things that too good to be true as a writer, he also has a strong reader's voice.

From the speech he gave last year, I found out that he is one of the people with the ability to make people listen to him. You can listen to him reading one of his book : The Graveyard Book, or from his current project with Blackberry : A Calendar of Tales.

Being a writer and a reader both at the same time, that is more than enough. 

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Movie : Premium Rush and I

I missed writing terribly. In this past 17 days without writing, I tried my best to consider it as my days with real life experiences and stories. I told myself that I needed this to be a better writer and observer.

I've read around 5 books, including novel graphics and travelogues. I've been to many places. I met people. I joined group activities such as watching television that make me felt dready after several hours. I shopped and walked and talked and cooked and all those social activities.

All without any drawing, doodling or writing.

It almost kick my patience, I was nearly attacked by anxiety.

And I'm back again!

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This topic reminded me of yesterday's movie I watched with Mr. S : Premium Rush.

Wilee is an example of an adrenaline junkie. Adrenaline junkie is a person that enjoys and addicted to the thrill of adrenaline rush. Usually it is also associated with extreme sport and typical activities like river rafting, rock climbing, bungee jumping. Anything associated with danger, and is highly risky. 

You know the feeling when you are out of breath, heart rate increases, the '"act now or die" moment. It will give you extra oxygen, energy, hormones. and euphoric feelings. 

The movie gave an interesting view from adrenaline junkies. I knew such people existed but I didn't really understand their condition. Maybe due to my almost serene and slow pace life I cherished so much. 

In the movie, Wilee chose to be what we call "reckless cyclist". He chose to use the most basic condition in a bike ; no brake, no gears. He chose not to be trapped in the normal life behind office desk like his friends. He wanted to be on the road, constanly moving, where he needed to think and act fast all the time. 

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How is this movie be connected with the introductory paragraph I just wrote above?

Well, It opened my eyes a bit. 

Although I don't wish for fast pace life, I know I am addicted with doing and producing something. The need to write or draw or doodle or read or anything as long as I am not lazying around. The foolish act of waking up from unplanned afternoon sleep with my heart beating up so fast because I feel like I've just wasted my time, sleeping. Is that even normal?

I do wish to be a little reckless once in a while. Knowing I plan almost everything, gives me a little feeling of being trapped in my own invisible rules. 

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PS : I love Joseph Gordon-Lewitt

Why Writers Write?

I found this interesting article on writers, taken from brainpickings. It was written by George Orwell, the famous writer of Animal Farm & 1984.

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Why I Write :

They exist in different degrees in every writer, and in any one writer the proportions will vary from time to time, according to the atmosphere in which he is living. They are:


1. Sheer egoism. 

Desire to seem clever, to be talked about, to be remembered after death, to get your own back on the grown-ups who snubbed you in childhood, etc., etc. It is humbug to pretend this is not a motive, and a strong one. Writers share this characteristic with scientists, artists, politicians, lawyers, soldiers, successful businessmen – in short, with the whole top crust of humanity. The great mass of human beings are not acutely selfish. After the age of about thirty they almost abandon the sense of being individuals at all – and live chiefly for others, or are simply smothered under drudgery. But there is also the minority of gifted, willful people who are determined to live their own lives to the end, and writers belong in this class. Serious writers, I should say, are on the whole more vain and self-centered than journalists, though less interested in money.


2. Aesthetic enthusiasm.

Perception of beauty in the external world, or, on the other hand, in words and their right arrangement. Pleasure in the impact of one sound on another, in the firmness of good prose or the rhythm of a good story. Desire to share an experience which one feels is valuable and ought not to be missed. The aesthetic motive is very feeble in a lot of writers, but even a pamphleteer or writer of textbooks will have pet words and phrases which appeal to him for non-utilitarian reasons; or he may feel strongly about typography, width of margins, etc. Above the level of a railway guide, no book is quite free from aesthetic considerations.


3. Historical impulse.

Desire to see things as they are, to find out true facts and store them up for the use of posterity.


4. Political purpose. 

Using the word 'political' in the widest possible sense. Desire to push the world in a certain direction, to alter other peoples' idea of the kind of society that they should strive after. Once again, no book is genuinely free from political bias. The opinion that art should have nothing to do with politics is itself a political attitude.

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A friend once told me, the Westerners love to categorize. They are eager to learn, analyze and categorize every single thing in this world. Why can't they just let certain things be? For example introvert and extroverts, types of writers, leaders and followers, left brain and right brain, and many other things!

But apparently, as much as I saw what he said was somewhat true, I still love to learn and categorize things. I've tried to explain to him on how certain people just want to learn and understand better. I told him how interesting human can be, most of the time. So what the Westerners are doing, helped a person like me as long as I just put those knowledge as mere reminder. 

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I am in category : Aesthetic enthusiasm. As far as I am concern, my love for literary is quite high. I can see and appreciate written words like one can appreciate great painting or good music. How about you? 

Don't be a Writer.

Yes.

Don't be a writer if you are afraid of other people's reaction on what you write. The reason you write something is usually because you want to share your thoughts and opinions with everyone. Living in this world where we can't stop what other people feel and think, you should already know the consequences before you start writing.

People judge. 

Some might disagree. 

Some might get offended to some extent where misunderstanding occurs.

I've been afraid of writing all my life. I've been putting walls around me. Just because I thought I was respecting everyone's differences and my thoughts are just some thoughts. My blogs were plain dull and factual. I don't show emotion. I was a hypocrite in disguise. Creating a world where I respect everybody and keep my mouth shut. 

I hide my sarcasm.

Don't be a writer if you are such person. Too afraid to point out what you feel and think. Don't be a writer if you can't show your attitude and personality. Don't be a writer if you are too afraid of other people's reaction. Don't be a writer if you will just cry under the blanket when you receive some hatred mail from people with different way of handling disagreement.

We are different. 

Writing means you are sharing some pieces of you with the world. A writer needs to be ready for the consequences. If you are not ready, then don't write. There is no point of writing something and deleting other people's comments when they disagree with you. You are supposed to embrace critiques like your best friend, because that will help you improve. 

No one is perfect.

If you just want praises and flowers all your way to becoming a good writer, just stop. Because you are just living in your imagination.

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Other article :

Why You Hate Writing by Robert Bruce