Introverts and I.

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Several weeks ago I came across a review on latest book by Susan Cain : Quiet. That's when I started to read properly about the real meaning of introvert. That's when I learned something about myself. That's when I understand and give myself a rest after struggling to keep up with the society all this while. Now I understand why I always feel the need of  being alone or stay quiet after a while, or how uncomfortable I was on every events that I had to attend, or why I feel like I was slowly suffocating and not energetic while being in working environment, even though I knew I work actively when I was alone in my room. That's why I choose one day of every month, as my time off from the society. Those thoughts about how I view family and friends, about my attachments to people, those things were explained. Finally, I understand that I was not troubled after-all, I am an introvert and I am not odd. I am no different than any other introverts in this world. And I feel relieved.  

I can't really explain how glad I was when I found out about this. I've been trying to cure things. I thought I should be like everyone. The worst is I keep on feeling guilty all the time. I was so hard on myself, and I hated myself for not trying harder. I told myself that if I can try to blend in, I will be okay eventually. But I feel worse most of the time.  

Most people I know, want to change me. And I feel disappointed and exhausted when I failed each time. I shouldn't feel bad about being myself, should I? Every person in this world is different. We can't change people, but we can try to tolerate and understand them.

If you are an introvert, it is okay. Give yourself a rest once in awhile. I know it is exhausting.

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By definition :
1. A shy, reticent and typically self-centered person.
2. A person predominantly concerned with their own thoughts & feelings rather than with external things.

Taken from : What is Introvert by Carol Bainbridge -

Basically, an introvert is a person who is energized by being alone and whose energy is drained by being around people. They are more concerned with the inner world of the mind. They enjoy thinking, exploring their thoughts and feelings. They often avoid social situations because being around people drains their energy. After being with people for any length of time, they need time alone to "recharge".

When introverts want to be alone, it is not a sign of depression. It means that they either need to regain their energy from being around people or that they simply want the time to be with their own thoughts. Being with people they like and are comfortable with, can prevent them from their desire to be quietly introspective.

Being introspective, though, does not mean that an introverts never has conversations. However, those conversations are generally about ideas and concepts, not about what they consider the trivial matters if social small talk.

Quiet by Stephanie :

I enjoy Quiet very much. I think most introverts will. But I hope it isn’t just introverts who read this book. I hope extroverts read it too. Introverts spend so much time trying to understand and get along in an extroverted world, it’s about time extroverts started to try to understand introverts too.


PS :
Being shy is different. Shy person tends to feel fear and anxiety in such cases like social gathering. While an introvert tends to feel uncomfortable and rather be in activities with less people or most cases, alone. 


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3 comments on "Introverts and I."
  1. thank you! you've helped me understand myself better. now i know i'm not shy, i'm just an introvert!

    ReplyDelete
  2. hihi.. i am an introvert too :)
    i rather be at home reading a book than going out :)

    ReplyDelete